James Franco is rumored to be gearing up to play Tommy Wiseau in an adaptation of The Disaster Artist, the book about the storied and mysterious mind responsible for the cult cinematic disaster-classic The Room. This is clearly not just a great idea but the greatest idea, and I have a few more ideas of who James Franco should play next. It involves a lot of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and shattered dreams.
Harold P. Warren from Manos: The Hands of Fate
Who is this guy? Like Wiseau, Warren is the auteur behind one of the biggest turkeys in all of moviemaking, Manos: The Hands of Fate. He is responsible for writing, directing, producing, and starring in this movie, which has a storied history (of sucking horribly) and Franco should get on this immediately after Wiseau. No trying necessary!
The Guy in Charge of Visual and Sound Effects on Birdemic
Franco could play him with his eyes closed and that would actually be my direction.
The Guy Who Noticed Gigli Was Not Going As Well As Planned
The people want to know why this hero decided not to be a hero. James Franco should tell his story.
Dwain Esper, King of the Celluloid Gypsies
The man who went from the carnival to filmmaking (a lateral move), Dwain Esper turned his life amongst traveling sideshows into an accidental movie career. Throughout the 1930s and 1940s, Esper — along with his wife, fellow carnie Hildegarde Stadie — made a name for himself as an exploitation filmmaker, producing scandalous titles such as Reefer Madness (aka Tell Your Children), Narcotic, Maniac, and Freaks under the guise of Production Code-compliant “educational” films.
Actually, James Franco doing a Dwain Esper film would be kind of…amazing. Gotta go! I have a screenplay to write…