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Why You Should Sleep Your Way to the Top of Your Chosen Profession

Let she who isn't a fan of memory foam cast the first stone.

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1) Pajamas.

2) Studies show that getting six hours of sleep greatly reduces your risk of depression and heart disease.

3) Saturday morning cartoons.

4) “To sleep is to dream.”

5) You can fall asleep to all those podcasts that you tell people at parties you listen to.


6) The pre-sleep “Sleepytime Tea” session.

7) Brushing your teeth with tri-colored toothpaste and feeling like there is a minty cloud in your mouth.

8) Getting back at your dad for a lifetime of emotional neglect.

9) Wearing your hot pink retainers and feeling thirteen again.

10) Saying individual goodnights — using first, middle, and last names — to the hotties on your One Direction poster.

11) Managers have huge dicks.

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